Only the Real can Truly Feel
by Vallewida Deaurneax
Summary: Driven by vengeance over the loss of his family. A lone wanderer in a land of black hearts. Two souls will come together. Only in death will they ever part. Welcome to my world; where the souls of the evil are purged. Rated M for a reason, Warnings and Disclaimers inside.


**(IMPORTANT! READ THE FOLLOWING BEFORE READING THE STORY! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.)**

**So I'm putting my other stories on Hiatus while I write this. I have odd spurts where I get into certain kinds of books, and after reading a jubilee of Ninja and Samurai books, I was inspired to write my own Shinobi tale... but based on a more realistic side of the ninjas in the days of old..**

**What that means is that there will be no Justsu, with the exception of illusions. I'm apologizing ahead of time, but Naruto was highly inaccurate in the portrayal of what ninjas were. Ninjas used Poison, Illusions, and Sound to kill their victims and drive their targets mad. They didn't throw shuriken and kunai that perfectly; Physics wouldn't allow it to fly properly and they would miss. Sorry, I'm going for a more realistic portrayal of ninjas.**

**This one will also be incredibly long. That's the plan. So my other stories are going to be on Hiatus (They'll be an on the side thing. I'll work on them while I write these chapters) for a while as I complete this story. This is the project I've been leading up to, and it's what I'm considering my best work, I'd like it if you would give it a chance. But If you don't want to waste your time with this, go.**

**WARNINGS: This story will contain intense blood, torture, rape, important character death and yaoi (If you don't know what yaoi is, you are obviously new to the internet. Look it up yourself.) It's going to be rated M. But I'm warning you now so I don't hear about it later when things get too intense for the squemish.**

**DISCLAIMERS: I do not own Naruto. Naruto is the product Masashi Kishimoto and belongs to him and Shounin Jump. I claim no ownership, nor am I making any sort of profit from it's production.**

**This is the Prologue.**

* * *

_'To stand with the crowd takes nothing. To stand alone takes everything.'_

Harsh winds shook the walls, becoming a hindrance to any form of thought process or any lack of such. Couple that with insomnia and a failed sleeping power and you can't shake the restlessness surrounding you. You attempt channel out the thoughts of the outside world. You try to focus only on what is familiar.

The sound of your own heart beat.

Your erratic breathing.

The back of your eyelids.

But all efforts are met in vain, and you watch as your thoughts collide with the outside disturbances.

And the only thought you can think of is,

**_'Is this because of what I did? Are the Gods themselves_ angered?'**

I shook my head, adjusting my night shirt. The storm outside gathering and not letting up even for a moment. Like yesterday, and the day before that.. and it will most likely be that way tomorrow.

Most would be taking precautions to sort and prepare rations for the next few months... the thought of the weather ruining this cropping season. But for me, it only seemed to mix with my own thoughts and memories.

The rain, that which is hard and unending... like my own journey._  
_

The lightning, that which is fierce and hot... like the vengeance burning in my heart.

The thunder, that which is loud and echoing... like the memories that played in my mind.

I was going to drive myself to madness if I didn't find some kind of peace in my own thoughts. Meditation and Medication were futile... so I was left to stew in it.

I sighed, walking over to the small basin across the room, drinking some, splashing some on my face and then drinking more.

_'Meditate. Keep meditating... nothing can hurt you when your soul is in the spirit world.'_

I chuckled, "Except my own thoughts... those seem to fuck me over constantly." I said, a disrespectful tone to my old master.

"Apologies Iruka-Sensei..." I said, seemingly to myself. Always honor the spirits long since passed and they will honor you in return.

With thoughts of my own honor in mind, I sat on the floor, crossing my legs and resting my hands on my knees.

_'Don't let your mind wander to anything other than vast emptiness. Clear your thoughts until you're thinking of absolutly nothing.'_

Other than natural reactions. Inhale through your nose, exhale through the mouth, ignore all distractions, listen to your beating heart.

And you enter the spirit world.

* * *

_"Naruto, Kaa-san said we need to get home!"_

_It was like this every time. And every time, I had to exit the spirit realm to keep from, literally, scarring myself to death._

_And I spent countless trips to the spirit world trying to change my reactions and words... expecting a change in the weave of space and time to change just because of one thing I could have done differently. But I knew that in the back of my mind that it would've turned out this way eventually... whether I'd caused it or not._

_But it never stopped me from trying._

_I knew what I should've said looking back. But, as always I responded with._

_"No! You can't make me Shimai-san!" I said, that same tone of indifference I had when I was 9 years old. Like most nine year olds, I wanted to spend my days and nights outside enjoying the roads and playing with my friends._

_"Naruto, I'm not playing this game today. I will go get Kaa-san if I have to!"_

_"Do it then! She can't find Naruto the Master of the Shadows."_

_Oh, the ignorance and innocence I lived in... Sadly misguided to the bigger scheme of things._

_"Fine! I'll be back, and you're going to get the switch!" Which was followed by the sounds of her shoes running against the dirt._

_I snickered slightly as I dropped from the tree I was hiding in, only to change my hiding spot. The bushes across the tree line looking quite inviting._

_I quickly ran across the road to the brush, finding a good spot that would shield me properly while keeping thorns out of my bum._

_I'd relived this memory so many times, I knew everything about it, down to my own mannerisms. While physical and vocal actions were far out of my grasp, my thoughts were my own._

_And I knew where this went. Voices taking form over the horizon. As realistic as the day I'd first heard them._

_"The gem, eh? Should be in this village, right boss?" said one crony._

_"Possibly, but I know we'll find it on this path. And remember boys..."_

_I paused, waiting for that distinct voice._

_"No one lives."_

_I gasped slightly, hoping I wasn't given away._

_"What was that?"_

_I covered my mouth, determined to be as silent as possible while starring out into the small opening between s few sporadic branches._

_There were three cronies standing around one man._

_One with strawberry blonde hair, dressed in a white tunic and shorts... he looks like he escaped prison... and his hair and eyes told me he wasn't a native to the area. His clothing wasn't native... and looked rugged and worn well past their usefulness_

_The other was a female, oddly. She walked proudly, and he legs spoke volumes on the strength they probably possessed. Her hair was red, and her eyes were graced with spectacles. Her kimono was far above what most would consider scandalous, the split showing her entire right thigh._

_The third... was far younger. Possibly my own age? Maybe older... I wasn't in the right position to think about it._

_But... the man in the middle... that was what always struck terror in my own heart. He was far taller than any of his followers. He wore a black cloak, and a brown straw hat to cover his own eyes... but they were piercing... like the serpent and his hair was long, and seemingly well cared for._

_His eyes zeroed in on the bushes I was hiding in, his gaze narrowing on my location._

_I would've broken my jaw if my hand clamped down much harder._

_I was obviously discovered. My heart was beating erratically in my chest, my blood roaring in my ears, sweat profusely pouring down my face. And in 9 years of existence, I have never felt terror as I did now._

_"Orochi, we can't stall any longer... those Akatsuki bastards will beat us to the gem if we don't move on." The red haired woman said, tugging his sleeve._

_"Of course, my dear Karin... you are right. Keep moving everyone. And Sasuke... stay back for this and don't use your sword unless I say so." The man named Orochi said, to the young man standing right beside him, clutching to his hamake protectively._

_"Yes, Orochimaru-sama." he said, nearly inaudibly._

_I kept my silent composure. not excitedly but anxiously awaiting what was about to happen... what would happen? I kept asking myself that same question as a million scenarios played in my head... but even the gruesome ones wouldn't compare to the scene I returned to._

_I lay in the spot for a good several hours, at least until I was sure those... people... monsters... demons... were far away... after this gem or whatever they were searching for._

_When I did finally give up the waiting game, the sun was nearly down._

_I steadily walked back to the village, my legs sore from the interim laying there on the dirt._

_I honestly wished I had just waited there... or had been caught and killed._

_Anything other than what I returned to._

_The village had burned. the houses structure mostly intact, but burned. Beyond repair in the villages current state._

_But charred corpses lined the streets. Some less intact than others._

_I steadily walked over to my own house... the steps that once gleamed in the sunlight were now black soot._

_The walls were once spotless... it wasn't extravagant. A simple home in a simple village... so why did they have to burn it down._

_"Why... why..." I kept reapeating that one word... that syllable... I couldn't express my confusion any better. How could I? The people I'd only known my entire life were lying all around me, their souls doomed to eternal damnnation due to their own ashes not being blessed._

_How could someone just do this._

_"Na...Naruto-san." I heard a voice croak out._

_I looked over to see my sister, kimono burned off, her body covered with severe burns, contusions and open wounds, just beginning to fester._

_This... this wasn't fair. She was my sister... why did she have to die? Why did any of this have to happen? It's not like we meant those bandits any harm!_

_Why... did they have to destroy my life and let me live with it?_

_"Water... nii-chan?"_

_I reached behind my shirt and pulled out my canteen, putting the drink to her mouth._

_"Nii-can... please... more..." she said._

_"Sh-shimai-chan... I... I don't have any more!"_

_"But... Tou and Kaa-san will be so thirsty..."_

_"Wh-where are they... who did this? Shimai, talk to me!"_

_"No... please... those people... they..." Shimai's tears began falling down her cheeks._

_It didn't take a genius to figure out what she was going to say. They had violated her. In only the most sacred of ways._

_"Shimai... I'm so so sorry..."_

_"Get... Get Tou-san's dagger and... run." Shimai said, her eyes closing... for what I assumed to be the final time_

_I nodded and stood up._

_"I... gotta get the dagger..."_

_My parents room... my parents... former room... was in the back of that house. I wasn't sure what to expect... I was sure my parents tried to fight those bandits off. I slid the door open to their room. What I saw was not expected._

_"Who the hell are you?!" I cried as I watched a man, praying over my parents charred and bloody bodies._

_His head snapped up with large force, "Naruto! Stop!"_

_I turned and ran down the hallway, throwing any object I could in his way._

_"Naruto, stop running now!"_

_"I don't know you! Someone help me!"_

_I ran to the front of the house, throwing the charred door out of my way._

_But I was stopped by the hands of a much larger man._

_'"NO PLEASE PLEASE I DON'T WANT TO DIE! PLEASE... please..." I said, my tone lowering to a low whisper._

_"Children... always so weak... I'm assuming he's the only survivor of Orochimaru's onslaught... or maybe the Akasuki ran though here... What do you say, Iruka?"_

_"Kakashi, you could do with a little more... compassion. He's a child."_

_The man named Kakashi sighed, cradling me in his arms._

_"Fine, but I won't coddle the boy."_

_Iruka, the other fully dressed man sighed, "Fine... Naruto... are you okay?"_

_I wasn't sure these men could be trusted, but I did feel safer in their presense._

_"How do you know my name? Where did you come from?" I asked._

_Iruka pondered for a moment, as if he were deciding what is okay to tell me everything._

_"Naruto... we were friends of your parents... we came when we saw smoke in this direction."_

_"We are from a small settlement to the west... you can call it Konoha."_

_"Your new home, kid..."_

* * *

My own eyes opened, finally returning to the physical world, the light starting to rise over the horizon.

The rain had stopped, the storm's remnants evident on the ground.

It was morning, none the less. My room was officially for rent.

It wasn't like I had much on my person anyway... my clothes and soap, and a purse for my money.

And of course, my dagger, pronged three times, a symbollic representation to an old saying.

"What you do unto others shall be forced back on you three times over."

And as long as my blade didn't taste the blood of those bandits that killed my family all those years ago... my joruney would never end.

Welcome to my world, where the souls of the unworthy are purged by the end of my blade. and only those who are real can truly feel.

* * *

**Prologue... which was far longer than I'd expected...**

**Not a lot of time too talk... but remember anything else I've written is on Hiatus for a while as I write this story.**

**Have a good evening.**


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